If we find it difficult to admit to mistakes, it is often because we have a harsh inner critic. Admitting to any mistake will inevitably mean heavy recrimination. Sigmund Freud called the inner critic, the superego. It monitors the behaviour of the individual. For numerous reasons, many people end up with very brutal and unforgiving superegos. And so, what choice does such a person have but to avoid admitting mistakes in order to avoid harsh treatment? Many of these same people will project those mistakes onto innocent others in their lives. I am sure it has happened to you that the very thing someone else is and you are not, is suddenly being thrust upon you as your own character trait. And more, there is no reasoning with the person who seems incapable of looking at themselves rationally.
Naturally then, the first step to being able to admit to mistakes is to soften the superego with thoughts such as: Everybody makes mistakes. Nobody’s perfect. This is how I learn. God forgives me. Those who love me forgive me. Those who don’t forgive me are not worth worrying about. I make mistakes because there is something I don’t understand. I am here to learn. I’m a work-in-progress. I am improving all the time.
It’s humility. We are loved. We can forgive ourselves and humbly try to improve every day with a little kindness, gratitude, and humour. We, as humans, are so very complex. Rare is one who is completely bad or completely good. We are a mixture. And at different times, we do better than at other times. There is no escaping every wrong deed and even every wrong thought. Life and karma take care of that. All must be correctly and honestly accounted for. Yet, somehow, in the midst of it all, we must not demonize people. The good that is there, we must see because it is that good which will carry the soul onward. Just as the bad must be repaid to God, so the good will also stand.
This article is from Love’s Longing