Coping with Meanness

Apart from the love in life, everyone also has a lot of meanness that happens to them. Sometimes, it is brought on by our own actions or attitude. However, even if we are careful to keep a good attitude in life, there are countless times when others will have ill-will towards us. In fact, if we try to fulfil our potential in life then it is guaranteed that much of that meanness will come from jealousy. If you are a man that women look at, be prepared for a lot of male ill-will. If you are a woman that men are interested in, be prepared for more than your share of female jealousy. Of course, much of the time it is not blatant meanness. Mostly, it is disguised in some form. It is the nature of human psychology that in order to progress in life, people feel that they need to undermine the competition. In the long run, it doesn’t work but that doesn’t seem to have any impact on lessening this human tendency. Continue reading “Coping with Meanness”

Connection

Every intimate relationship with a partner will bring back old, unfinished childhood-parenting issues. They lie in wait, to resurface in a different context – one in which we are an adult and can start to process things that were beyond us as a child to even understand, let alone resolve. The parent who abandoned, for example, is not gone. The whole issue and every emotion attached to it will come stomping back into the arena under the guise of an adult relationship. When we look for a partner, the last thing people generally want is some connection to their own, usually faulty, upbringing. However, the in-built healing push in humans will make the connection inevitable. Continue reading “Connection”

Making Mistakes

If we find it difficult to admit to mistakes, it is often because we have a harsh inner critic. Admitting to any mistake will inevitably mean heavy recrimination. Sigmund Freud called the inner critic, the superego. It monitors the behaviour of the individual. For numerous reasons, many people end up with very brutal and unforgiving superegos. And so, what choice does such a person have but to avoid admitting mistakes in order to avoid harsh treatment? Many of these same people will project those mistakes onto innocent others in their lives. I am sure it has happened to you that the very thing someone else is and you are not, is suddenly being thrust upon you as your own character trait. And more, there is no reasoning with the person who seems incapable of looking at themselves rationally. Continue reading “Making Mistakes”

Spiritual Evolution

One morning at the coffee shop, my coffee arrived with the word love inscribed in the froth. A simple act, but sweet and uplifting. Little acts of goodwill help to soothe the pain of human hurt and ease the complexities of ongoing existence. All life is on a continuum. Everyone is at a different level of consciousness which means we are all at a different point in our spiritual development. How we each think, speak, and act is directly related to our level of consciousness and we can do very little else except by gradual evolution. So what sense does it make to blame someone else or ourselves for being where we are? Continue reading “Spiritual Evolution”

Family Tension

Many people think that it is only their own family that is dysfunctional and try to keep such things secret. Holiday periods, in particular, are notorious for family friction. If the tension gets strained enough, it will erupt leaving those in its wake battered and bewildered. The first step to healing such feuds and tensions is to be honest about their existence. The second is to discern the underlying issues which are beneath the, usually, trivial setting-off of the conflict. The third is to let wisdom and common sense speak about either boundary setting or, if it is possible, an honest and sincere reconciliation. Fourth, regardless of one’s decisions and actions, without forgiveness we will accumulate yet another grudge, adding to the many that are already part of a normal human consciousness. To carry a grudge is to shorten one’s life, poison one’s health, and contract one’s heart. Knowing this makes forgiveness an easier choice. Continue reading “Family Tension”

Forgiveness

Of all the qualities that make for a happy, healthy life and a progressive spiritual path, forgiveness is one of the most basic and important. Genuine forgiveness is not a common attitude of heart. It requires too much honesty and too little ego for the average person. It is a deep and solitary process known to the individual and God. Its ramifications are highly beneficial and, sometimes, miraculous. To have an ongoing practice of forgiveness is to extend one’s health, beauty, and agelessness, ever increasing one’s ability to face life with freshness and energy as one grows in wisdom and loses the burden of resentment. If one learns to become aware of hidden resentments and releases them then one will glow with lightness all through the years. The passing of years will have minimal effect as it is the accumulation of hurt, not the passing of years, which ages people most rapidly. Continue reading “Forgiveness”