What Are We Afraid Of?

On the opposite end of the scale to the needy person is the excessively non-needy person. They have their own problems. Usually, the reason that the person is non-needy is because they have put a lot of effort into protecting themselves from other people, generally for good reason. They have learned that emotional independence is an effective means of protection. And it is. However, the emotional independence often becomes isolation. It pushes everyone away. It is indiscriminate. It cannot distinguish between what is harmful and what is beneficial. Everyone is lumped into the same basket of not to be trusted. Continue reading “What Are We Afraid Of?”

Healing of Abuse

One of the damaging things that can happen in life is sexual abuse. That is particularly so when it comes from a parent or a religious figure who is meant to carry the purity of love and guardianship. It leaves the body of the victim with a distrust and disgust of one of nature’s most brilliant inventions – the human body capable of and programmed for sexual bonding. It leaves the heart of the victim with a black hole of emotional wariness and fear. Oh yes, it’s damaging alright. Obviously, the innocent need to be protected and the guilty called to justice and contained. This helps, but does it heal? Does it heal the body? Does it heal the heart? No. Continue reading “Healing of Abuse”

Sitting In the Stalls of Life

I looked across the ice rink from where I was sitting and what I saw brought tears to my eyes. It was such a simple thing – just a boy and a girl, becoming a young man and a young woman. My son was still very much a beginner skater. Skating is such a technically demanding sport, it takes years to become competent. However, even though he was a beginner, he was a male figure skater. Anyone in the skating or dancing world knows what that means. A good male skater or dancer is highly valued and is in great demand. And so, it was not surprising that from the moment we arrived, all the young female skaters would have definitely been aware of my son’s presence. It’s great for the ego! Continue reading “Sitting In the Stalls of Life”

Opening the Door to our Inner World

Life has cycles. We move into things and we move out of things. Some of the more challenging movements are when relationships end or when we lose someone that we love through death or another way or when something ends that is very important to us like a career. Other events which are much more positive can also be challenging, such as the formation of a relationship, getting married, buying a house or having a baby. All these types of events in life touch our inner world. They open a door inside us. Continue reading “Opening the Door to our Inner World”