Relationships and Commitment

All significant relationships have a price. It’s not that relationships are a sacrifice. After all, who wants a life of sacrifice? It is more a matter of priorities. We can’t do everything in life and we can’t be with everyone in life. In choosing what we will do and with whom, we automatically make priorities. If something is at the top of our list then other things have to come second or third or last. Continue reading “Relationships and Commitment”

The Trouble with Falling in Love

NEW ARTICLE!

A Mind of Its Own

Although highly enjoyable (at certain stages), falling in love is problematic. The first problem is who we can fall in love with. We can fall in love with anyone:

  • a gay person when we are not gay (or maybe we are gay but the wrong gender)
  • a married person who happens to be not married to us (or we could be the married person falling in love with someone other than our partner)
  • an unsuitable person in terms of age, personality, lifestyle, or future goals
  • or, worst of all, a person who doesn’t love us in return.

However, even if we fall in love with a gender and sexual orientation-appropriate, availability-appropriate, age and life goals-appropriate person, falling in love is still highly problematic because of the inherent dynamic of the process itself. This leads to our second problem – the design of the falling in love mechanism. Falling in love seeks to achieve a thing that it is incapable of achieving. It seeks wholeness but inevitably leads to pain, fear, and failure. We need not give up on love but we do need to understand it. Continue reading “The Trouble with Falling in Love”

Circles of Separation: Handspun

“We’re our own worst enemy,” said Wolfgang.  “We’re, also, our own best friend.”

Chapter 54: Best Friend

Tonight was the last Dementia Unit dance class. Wolfgang was in fine form and had been talking nonstop. “I like making a noise,” he joked. “I should have been a politician. Do you know that I come here every morning to have breakfast with my Madeline?”

“No,” said Gabriel. “That’s devoted.” Continue reading “Circles of Separation: Handspun”

Circles of Separation: Winter Lights

Love is its own reward.

Chapter 45: Suspicious Arrangements

Mullum-Mullum was not in the rose garden. Amira decided to walk up the back steps of the old house and look around the verandah. Some dusty boxes and a few bits of dirty furniture were haphazardly pushed into a corner where they had remained for years. She spotted a small bookshelf and pulled out several, yellowed books. Her eyes landed on a familiar green cover. It was The Little Book of Healing. On the inside of the cover was a sticker saying, This book belongs to Rose Este. The book had long since ceased publication. Amira had given her precious copy to Thomas, a few years ago. There was something quite peculiar about the little book. Amira didn’t know if other people had the same experience but whenever she opened it, she seemed to read pages that she had never seen before. As she had read the book many times and it wasn’t long, she eventually decided that the book changed its contents depending on what was needed. She put it in her pocket and went back to her and Gabriel’s apartment. Continue reading “Circles of Separation: Winter Lights”

Circles of Separation: Magic Men and Women

There was something unusual about Rose. She didn’t do or say anything unusual but whenever she was around, everything worked well.

Chapter 42: Om Mani Padme Hum

Farkas pulled his hood on and made a run for Ide’s front porch in the storm. He was picking up baby Lan-Lan. Ide had been able to keep the house that she and Farkas had jointly owned, at least, for now. The main elder of the Clinkers had decided to rent Ide’s large, front room. He was using it for meetings and private sessions and, occasionally, sleeping there. His tribe name was Salt, although, Ide’s teenage son, Christopher, had always referred to him as Magic Man. That is the name that stuck in Farkas’s mind. Although Salt was an elder, he was far from elderly. At seventy, he could run through the forest almost as fast as the young Clinker men and he could, certainly, outwit them. Continue reading “Circles of Separation: Magic Men and Women”

Circles of Separation: Make-Overs and Move-Ons

Beautiful things come together one stitch at a time.

Chapter 37: Decorating Skeletons

Amira was walking along the main street of Waldmeer, greeting the locals, and looking into the shop windows to see if any of the familiar places had changed. It was her first visit back since moving to Darnall. “Hello,” said a lady outside the Op Shop. Amira didn’t recognise the woman but, on closer inspection, realised it was Amelia.

“You look so different,” said Amira. Continue reading “Circles of Separation: Make-Overs and Move-Ons”

Circles of Separation: Choose Again

Don’t feed the drama monster. It’s insatiable and has no friends.

Chapter 28: Drama

Amira took every opportunity that crisp, glorious day to be outside. She walked down to the beach and returned via the shops and up the hill taking the longer route past Verloren’s holiday house. There was a For Sale sign in the front garden. She stopped to look at it and wondered why Verloren would be selling. In the five years since Farkas sold this house to Verloren, thought Amira, he has lived at Charlie’s property in the back hills and in Ide’s bungalow, bought a house, started a relationship, had a baby, ended a relationship, and, hopefully, is now resurrecting that same relationship. What Amira didn’t recall was Farkas’s two interdimensional trips to the North Country; one to the wolf pack for a whole winter and one to the Head Gardener’s house in the Garden of Garourinn. Verloren had, also, been given the privilege of an interdimensional visit to the Garden of Garourinn in her earliest Waldmeer days. Its value seemed to lie dormant for the many years since. Verloren did, occasionally, dream of the Head Gardener. She didn’t know who it was other than a wise man giving advice. Generally, she couldn’t recall what the advice had been. Continue reading “Circles of Separation: Choose Again”