Chapter 1: Better or Worse
After six months of living in Store Creek with the cold weather, it was good to finally arrive at spring’s doorstep. Merlyn wondered if that was why Ben had decided to visit today. He said it was a rental inspection. But that was just a joke. At least, Merlyn hoped it was a joke. Although it was two years since their separation, they had been married for three years. Nothing needed inspecting.
Merlyn’s mind was put at ease once he arrived. He appeared to have no interest in checking on anything. He chatted for an hour or two before saying that it was time to return to the city and that he had a big week ahead of him at the State Ballet.
While walking down the dirt driveway, Ben said, “I’m sorry Merlyn. I know you like living here but I’ve decided to sell Nanna’s House.”
Merlyn stopped walking. “Oh,” she said.
She thought, That’s why he came.
She knew she had no right to question his decision. She had had the benefit of living in a house she loved with very reasonable rent.
“It’s too big an expense,” explained Ben. “Holiday houses are a luxury. A luxury I can’t afford. You originally said that you staying here was only temporary and that you would find somewhere else in Store Creek.”
“Yes, of course,” said Merlyn.
“I have to do what’s best for me,” said Ben.
“It’s fine,” said Merlyn. “You, definitely, have to do what’s best for you.”
Ben nodded. He looked away towards the surrounding hills and said, “Marry me.”
Merlyn felt she must have misheard him. However, she caught the look in his eyes and then knew she had not. She turned towards the garden in an attempt to order her thoughts. There were many reasons to say, no. Many more to say, Let’s see. She looked closely at the overgrown garden. She never did clean it up as she had promised. It wasn’t laziness. She couldn’t bring herself to interfere with it. It was doing such a magnificent job on its own. The Carolina jasmine was covered in large, trumpet-type, yellow flowers – toxic to children but too beautiful to remove with no immediate danger. Merlyn could smell its perfume, now and again, when the breeze came their way. Below the climber, the ground was completely covered with tiny, blue forget-me-nots which had spread uncontained for the past few decades. Nothing looked stressed or confused or in need of a momentous decision.
For some reason, possibly due to the forget-me-nots, she said just as quietly as Ben had, “Yes.”
As he was in no state to hear anything subtle, Ben continued talking, “I know it’s unexpected, after two years and all. In the beginning, I thought I’d be better off without you.”
Although a little offended, Merlyn wanted Ben to finish what he had to say. He may not say these words again.
“The thing is,” said Ben. “I’m worse off without you. And even if I wasn’t, I don’t want to be without you.”
He couldn’t say any more. That was all he had.
“I already said, yes,” said Merlyn taking his hand. “Anyway, technically speaking, I said yes five years ago and that still applies because we are still married.”
Ben smiled and pulled Merlyn towards him. He was considerably taller than her. She breathed in the smell of his chest. It smelled good. It seemed so long since she had smelled it and, yet, it was still very familiar.
Pushing aside the overhanging vine from the front door, Ben light-heartedly complained, “I don’t know why we have to have a front door that is so well camouflaged that it is a mission to get back into our own home.”
Donna Goddard 